Recently , I was in ICU for some strange reasons . An acquaintance , who may also be called a distant relative , had had a cerebral stroke , after having undergone a hip replacement surgery a couple of years ago , and being wheelchair bound as it is .
He had been sick for quite some time . The family gathered in the foyer . Grieving siblings , silver haired , and anxious . Other relatives , distant and cold during better days , flew in from really "distant and cold " climes to see how he's faring, now that a troublesome mouth had been silenced , and a bitter mind laid to rest . Well , almost .
The person departing was not very popular . However , his spouse had powerful and rich siblings , who kept a hawk eye on her . Ensuring her well being . In good times and in bad .
Solidarity with a capital S , was quite visible .
It wasn't clear how many had gathered to bid goodbye . Or just come to watch Tamasha .
Some conferenced with the treating physician . Others , impatiently clear , just wanted to know , " how much time was left " . Still others , stoically , kept vigil .
Modern science , if anything , has muddled up the "going away " process . Quite terribly . There are hits , and then there are misses . Near misses . Close shaves . And "I don't know whens " . "Can't say how long ?" "Please take him home now ."
A hefty guard /ayah closely monitored visiting hours , down to the last minute , and last teary eyed sullen faced relative. She had taken it upon herself to shove in visitors , one by one , whether willing or not , and to extricate visitors from the bedside of the patient , whether willing or not .
Needless to say , like life , and strange things in it , she was the conscience keeper , of the entire family ,and ensured the balance of life . Like nature .
Doctors , with their limited abilities , despite the burden of degrees professed , hummed and hawed over sticky questions with unpredictable outcomes .
The patient himself , his reputation notwithstanding , didn't help matters . He waxed and waned , and how . One day , he , suddenly opened his long shut eyes , took a long and enquiring look at all the sullen faces around his bed , and proclaimed his teary -eyed love for long estranged people . Next day , with his parameters WNL ( within normal limits ) , he obstinately shut his eyes and refused to communicate .
Third day , he waved his arms around , trying desperately , to articulate sentences , through the endotracheal tube lodged into his throat . His parameters went askew again .
Within a week , however , he had "stabilised " enough to be discharged home , when all the relatives , disappointed , did the vanishing act . Enter "professionals " who fed him evil looking nasogastric feeds . changed diapers and positions , emptied urobags , and adjusted the volume of oxygen flow , all in a home setting .
Charging a kidney almost , these professionals , raised alarm , when in the wee hours of a weekday , the oxygen levels plummeted. However , life , playing peekaboo , didn't depart till late that night , giving enough time to absentee sons to mark their presence.
The body was kept waiting , while the rest readied themselves for the final departure .
One last look , a sigh , and one final "so long , old man . "
Keeping everyone guessing , on their toes , in life as in death , a maverick character , whether "to be or not to be " . Whether he loved someone , or didn't , whether he was going to go or stay , leaving the living counterparts in a quandary . Whether to celebrate the departure or to mourn the loss . Whether be relieved or anguished . Dark glasses come in handy , in such situations , and breathable cotton masks , disguise and deceive .
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