Burglar

"I saw a burglar last night'!! The boy calmly declared to his stunned family at the breakfast table.
Mama's hand froze at the tap, leaving the tap on ( a sign of extreme duress) she asked him, with dripping hands, almost in a whisper,"why didnt you wake me up then , boy?"
"He was looking in through my window"The boy coolly took a bite of his toast and proceeded to noisily chew it.
"What? Omg!!" the drama queen pulled at her ear plugs, leaving Taylor Swift mid song,"did he wave a gun at you?"
"What did he look like?"
"He must have looked like you"
"Rather like you I guess".
"Should have stolen your wretched ipad"
"Should have taken a shot at you while he had the chance, "
"Point blank hota, na "

The air around the table changed swiftly from fear to fight,and Mama didn't like it one bit.

"Sileeence!!"Hands on hips, the matriarch yelled, and Taylor Swift swiftly went crooning back into ear canals.
Toasts were hurriedly crammed into mouths.
"Now, tell me what had happened?"Lowering her voice, Mama pulled up a chair as she demanded to know the relevant details.

"Your son reads in the bed."
Papa declared from the doorstep. stamping his foot on the doormat , to get rid of the mud from early morning watering the plants.
"Kya bolte ho ji?"(what are you saying?)
"I am right!!Aren't I ? Young man!!"
The boy stopped chewing.
"He lights up a torch, inside the quilt , and reads dirty novels , like that Harry Potter fellow."
"Hai na!!"(Isn't it?)

Hurriedly swallowing the large bite, the son asked wide -eyed"How do you know?"

"Because I saw you doing it last night, when I looked in through your window, after tying up my petunias."